Thursday, August 6, 2009

She said "Yes"!

She is articulate. I try to be.
She's levelheaded. I'm more emotional.
She can sew & knit. I SO (k)not ? :)
She's older than me. I'm younger than her.
She's more serious. I'm more playful
(but I saw her boogie board w/ my own eyes the other day! ...wish I got a pic!!)

The point here is.... we're VERY different & yet she's a VERY dear friend.

Below is the letter (edited w/ some blanks)- unlike any other I've ever written - that I wrote & e-mailed to her back in 3/06 when I was reeling from having made the most difficult decision I've ever made in my entire life - & was left hoping I did the right thing but not certain of it. It all left me desperately wanting to know God better & to never not know what His will is in any situation ever again. Somehow I sensed she could - & just may - help. As you'll see, I gave her every opportunity to say "No."

Dear _________,

I've considered asking you a question for quite some time.... and occasionally had almost mustered up the courage, only to put it off until another time. I had actually picked up the phone to ask you today, but then was concerned that both a.) I would get all tongue tied, and b.) that you might feel "put on the spot". So....long story short, I decided to ask you this hopes that it will give you some time to think it over, perhaps pray about it and reply without feeling too pressured.

I am wondering if by any chance you would consider mentoring/discipling me? As I have watched you from a distance, and gotten to know you better in the past several months, I have really come to admire you for so many reasons ---- some of which include your servants heart, your quiet yet confident faith, your beautiful family, your honesty, etc.

I have weathered some pretty intense "storms" in my life over the past couple of years that very few people are aware of - but one thing I've learned as a result, is that I have soooooo much to learn! I am at a point where I really want to get to know God better. I know in order to do that, I need to study His Word - but sometimes it seems that after reading, I am left with more questions than answers. I would just really like to have someone I know and trust to go to in confidence with those questions. I don't really want to do a "structured"/"pre-fabricated" Bible Study. What I do want to do is read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation (which I'm embarrassed to say, I have never done in it's entirety) and write down questions I have as I go to discuss. I also would just like someone I can discuss general "life" questions that come up periodically.

Please understand that I love and fear The Lord and simply want to get to know Him better. I grew up in a Christian home - My father passed away when I was 14 - and my mother was ill and in and out of the hospital fairly often after that. In many ways, roles were reversed in my relationship with my mother - in that I took care of both her and I - and she was more like the child. Looking back I can see that what I thought was pretty normal .... was really rather dysfunctional. I married and moved away at age 18 and have been happily married for almost 20 years. Our family has relocated on average about every 4-5 years - which has left me with very few solid relationships/friendships. While I keep in touch with many people, there are really none that I would trust with what I'm asking you to do for me --- and none of them are nearby anyhow.

Out of all the women I know and admire at _____________ Church, you are the one I believe I admire most - even though I realize I don't know you all that well. Anyhow - that is why I chose you to ask - and finally mustered up the courage to actually do it. However I don't want to pressure you in any way - and if your plate is simply too full - or if for any reason you don't feel up to it, please feel free to just say so. I know how awkward I feel asking....and would hate knowing that I made you feel just as awkward in replying. I really would understand if you said no.


Now, if I can just muster up the courage to hit the "send" button...... :) Here goes :)....

Note: Praise God! She said "Yes"! :) - & we've faithfully been reading/studying God's Word together for over 3 yrs now & discussing it via e-mail which is ideal for me bc doing it "this way" allows me to write/journal thru' the process (taking my time to wrap words around my thoughts, things I wonder, things I'm learning, sensing, etc. before sharing them w/ her) - & in that process, I've been blessed in many ways ... with among them, a VERY dear friend.


MyStory of HiStory said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MyStory of HiStory said...

This comment was from my husband (he e-mails his comments to me) after reading this post:

I loved it… Knowing how you were feeling and wanting to ask and feeling you couldn’t

It’s amazing the change in you from 3 years ago..

I’m so glad to have you back.

Love me

My note: by "back" I think he means back from the brink of losing your (my) mind :) Seriously. That's how difficult "that most difficult decision" I mentioned in the post - & it's aftermath - was. It's one thing when I sense a difference in me - but when someone close to me senses it too...that is SO encouraging :) God is SO good.

Randi Sue said...

What a priceless relationship.